“CROTCHLESS PANTIES WITH A CUPLESS SHELF BRA?!” one person demanded to know as the controversy grew
A dad took to the internet for advice after his choice of Christmas gift for his daughter ended up being controversial.
The story, which was posted to an anonymous forum, included a teen pregnancy, religious grandparents and an online wishlist. All those details added up to a highly engaging post for the Reddit AITA (am I the a–hole) community.
Read on to see for yourself exactly what went down, according to OP (original poster).
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AITA for buying my daughter lingerie?
“I had my daughter when I was just 16, after she was born I couldn’t see her for the first two years. My then girlfriend’s parents were really religious and they didn’t want me to have anything to do with their granddaughter,” OP began their post. “When I was finally allowed to see her my ex had already found someone else. After I finished high school I went to study abroad for a few years and I only saw my daughter 2-3 times a year.”
“I moved back to my home country three years ago and since then my ex has agreed to let our daughter spend one weekend a month with me,” he explained, for background. “For the past few years I’ve been giving my daughter money for Christmas but this year she told me she didn’t want money. So I asked my ex for suggestions regarding the present and she told me to just get her clothes that she wants. So two weeks before Christmas I messaged my daughter and asked her what clothes she wanted and she sent me a link to a wishlist and told me to just pick something from it. There weren’t that many clothes there so I just ordered everything that was on her list.”
Since then my daughter has been messaging me almost every day and she said she can’t wait to spend the upcoming weekend at mine.
Then came what appeared to be the young dad’s first official Christmas with his daughter.
“This year my ex invited me to spend Christmas at their house since her husband was going away to visit his family so I did,” he wrote. “When it came time to open presents my daughter was very happy that I ordered everything she wanted. She tried on a few things but the rest she said she was going to try on later.”
“I went home that evening but at 10pm I got an angry call from my ex saying that I was stupid and irresponsible for buying our daughter lingerie,” he recalled. “I explained to her that it was on the list our daughter sent me. We argued for a bit about this and then she hung up on me. Afterwards I messaged my daughter and I told her that I didn’t know I wasn’t allowed to order this for her but she told me that [her] mom was just overreacting and that she loved the clothes I ordered for her.”
“It’s been a while since Christmas but my ex is still angry at me,” he concluded, “But since then my daughter has been messaging me almost every day and she said she can’t wait to spend the upcoming weekend at mine. So AITA here? I honestly don’t know what to think.”
“In case that’s important, our daughter is 15, me and my ex are both 31 and we’re from Europe,” he added for further information.
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He Got Support — But Redditors Wanted to Know What He Meant by Lingerie.
Most of the comments on the post came from women who took the daughter’s side in the situation, explaining that things that might be considered “lingerie” were in fact just normal underwear that could be more appropriate depending on the outfit.
As one popular comment noted: “I’m gonna go NTA. Imho lingerie is just nicer underwear and if a 15 year old girl wants a lacy bra and a thong or whatever, I really see no problem with it. I think it’s pretty cool she felt comfortable showing you that wishlist. At that age my friends and I all had basic underwear and a couple of nicer pieces that we probably wore to feel a bit more grown up. None of us even had a boyfriend.”
Which got another Redditor to respond, writing: “Thongs can be racey BUT they’re actually great for under skirts or tight trousers where you don’t want to show your underwear line.”
But they’re Satan’s panties!
While others thought it important to know what exactly OP was talking about: “I think it depends on what exactly the lingerie is… Is it a cute bra and panties, is it a teddy…. Is it CROTCHLESS PANTIES WITH A CUPLESS SHELF BRA?!”
Then came a commenter who said a response from OP, which had seemingly expired, actually showed what he had purchased.
“Apparently op posted a link which isn’t there anymore and it wasn’t anything exotic. Just a nice set,” they explained.
While a reply from OP was still active on Reddit, with him explaining: “It was an underwear set that is a bit more revealing than the ‘standard/boring’ ones.”
However, one commenter was more interested in another detail in the post: “Why would a religious family keep the father away from the daughter? How is that better for the kid? I thought religion was all about keeping family intact?”
“My family is atheist and they didn’t want non religious people around the child,” OP explained. “And in our country if you have a child under 18 the mother’s parents become legal guardians until the mom turns 18 (unless she is married) so there wasn’t anything I could do.”
Which led one Redditor to muse: “Also, if the ex is ultra religious like her parents are the gifts actually lingerie or are they just not basic and conservative undies? Maybe it was just a standard push up bra and a thong or even cheeky undies and mom threw a fit because it’s too racy for her liking.”
Leading another to humorously add: “But they’re Satan’s panties!”
What do you think?
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