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For some women, giving birth after 40 can feel like a distant dream. Doctors start referring to our ovaries as geriatric at the tender age of 35, increasing the pressure to find a find a partner, bust in wide open, and get knocked up. And while that seems like a quick and easy formula to adopt, the process doesn’t always follow a cookie-cutter blueprint.
Why do women consider giving birth after 40?
There are a multitude of reasons why women decide to pursue motherhood later in life. For some, they become knee-deep in their careers and allow time to get away from them. On an episode of Oprah’s Where Are They Now? Vivica Fox opens up about not having children. “That’s the biggest regret of my life that I have is that I didn’t have a child,” she tells the host.
The actress shares that sentiment often while reflecting on her life. In an interview with DJ Vlad, Fox says her work schedule and not finding the right guy got in the way of her dream to become a mother. Now, with six godchildren, the legendary actress found solace in her decision.
Others battle fertility issues that slowly chip away at their dream of carrying a healthy baby into a full-term birth. Gabrielle Union shared her struggles to conceive with her husband, Dwyane Wade, in her book, “We’re Going to Need More Wine.”
“I have had eight or nine miscarriages,” Union wrote. “For three years, my body has been a prisoner of trying to get pregnant — I’ve either been about to go into an in vitro fertilization (IVF) cycle, in the middle of an IVF cycle, or coming out of an IVF cycle.”
After years of trying the actress had a baby girl via a surrogate.
Then there are the women like myself. I am a 40-year-old lesbian with an enormous desire to have a baby. In 2019, I had four failed pregnancy attempts. As a single woman, it was emotionally draining to process my body’s refusal to fertilize my eggs, so I decided to wait until I was in a loving relationship. With 41 creeping up on me, I’ve had to redefine what motherhood looks like to me. It’s not impossible, but if it’s supposed to happen, it will.
When I read stories about celebrities who gave birth after 40, it reminds me that time is an illusion. If you’re four decades in and seeking inspiration or encouragement about getting pregnant, you’ll want to keep reading.
Click next to check out the 10 Black women who successfully gave birth after 40.
