Howie Mandel will never forget the day he shared his obsessive compulsive disorder diagnosis with the world for the first time.
During an appearance on The Howard Stern Show in 1998, Mandel, 69, witnessed somebody touch the exit door’s nobs. What came next was a series of events that would change his life.
“It was my turn to leave and I said, ‘I don’t want to touch the door. Open the door for me,’” Mandel exclusively shared with Us Weekly before kicking off season 20 of America’s Got Talent on Tuesday, May 27. “They wouldn’t open the door. They thought they were being funny and they were. And then I grabbed tissues to open the door.”
While some people witnessing the sequence of events thought it was funny, Mandel believed he was starting to have a panic attack.
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“I said, ‘I can’t breathe and you’re going to have to call 911 if you don’t open the door,’” he shared with Us. “I walk out the hall and they’re still talking. And I went, ‘That was on the f***ing air.’ I didn’t know. I thought it was in a commercial. And then I got devastated.”
According to the Mayo Clinic, OCD features a pattern of unwanted thoughts and fears known as obsessions. These obsessions can lead to repetitive behaviors or compulsions, which can have an impact on daily life.
More than 25 years after accidentally sharing his diagnosis with the world, Mandel still remembers the emotions he felt.
While he shares more details in his memoir, Here’s the Deal: Don’t Touch Me, Mandel said he was fearful after leaving the studio.
Howie Mandel, Simon Cowell, Terry Crews, Sofia Vergara and Mel B Cindy Ord/NBC
“My heart sank and I thought, ‘I just embarrassed my family. I’m not going to have a career. Nobody’s going to hire me anymore,’” he said. “I was going to run into traffic here.”
In a quick turn of events, Mandel said a male stranger approached him on a busy New York City street and told the comedian that he was listening to The Howard Stern Show.
Mandel quickly realized he was not alone in his diagnosis.
“He went, ‘Me too.’ And I went, ‘What? What does that mean?’” Mandel shared. “He goes, ‘I have that too. Thanks for talking about it.’ He helped me.”
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Despite his initial fears, Mandel continues to have a successful career in Hollywood. In addition to being a comedian, the best-selling author is returning to judge season 20 of America’s Got Talent with familiar friends like Mel B, Sofia Vergara and Simon Cowell. “I say this every year and I don’t want to be repetitive, but the thing about our show is previous years always inspire,” he told Us. “Somebody sees somebody do something and they go, ‘I can do that faster. I can do that higher. I can do that more.’ … Because we’re celebrating an anniversary, I think people have done things more dangerous, more different, more surprising and more original than I’ve ever seen.”
America’s Got Talent returns to NBC Tuesday, May 27, at 8 p.m. ET. Stream old episodes anytime on Peacock.
