Father’s Day can stir up a reminder of all the lessons we’ve learned from our dads. While we might teach them skincare routines and how to install a male unit, they raise us with lessons about beauty, confidence, and how to achieve our heart’s desires whether we realize it or not.
Growing up, what we learned from our father figures– from fathers to step fathers, grandfathers and uncles– guides us throughout adulthood.
Today, in honor of Father’s Day, we look back and acknowledge all the lessons we don’t want to unlearn. Below, 8 ESSENCE editors share the important self-confidence guidance they’ve received from their fathers.
Akili King, Senior Beauty Editor
“Growing up, I remember my dad would brush my hair before school, putting it into a slicked-back puff. I didn’t realize it at the time, but now I see how important those bonding moments were. I’m grateful to have a father that would take time out of his busy mornings to make sure I felt my best before heading into the school day.
Additionally, he would often affirm me and my hair, telling me how much he loved the ‘fro, which went a long way for me. Even in more recent years, I remember tweeting something about how I was struggling to find a good foundation that wouldn’t break me out. He commented and said, ‘well, it’s a good thing you don’t need any makeup anyway’” I thought it was the sweetest thing. Although I do minimal makeup in general, it definitely encouraged me to further embrace my skin in any phase.
Aside from this, my dad has always encouraged me to pursue my dreams and do what makes me happy. I’m super thankful for that.”
Dominique Fluker, Contributing Lifestyle Editor
“My father passed when I was 20 years old. Throughout my life, he encouraged me to have unwavering confidence. He showed me that beauty is confidence.”
Kenyatta Victoria, Contributing GU Editor
“My dad always taught me to be fearless when pursuing what I wanted. He instilled in me from a young age that I’m capable of anything no matter how quiet I was growing up. Through those lessons, I could feel and look my best because I was already in a confident headspace thanks to my dad.”
Devine Blacksher, Senior Fashion Editor
“I’ve learned so many lessons about confidence from my dad. Since I was a kid, he has always encouraged me to be the boldest version of myself. I was definitely a shy child, which might surprise people, but he always told me to ‘start strong, stay strong.’ These words still resonate with me when I feel uncertain. He also showed me how to be accepting and honest with myself.
I remember going through a bad breakup a few years ago. I would call him, crying and being so hard on myself, and he would say, ‘Devine, look in the mirror. Do you like what you see?’ This helped me tap into self-love and taught me to pause and give myself grace. It was a truly beautiful lesson that changed my life. He’s also always pushed me to express myself and not care about what others think. I’m so blessed to have him as my dad—the coolest person I know!”
India Espy-Jones, Beauty Writer
“My dad used to say he had kids (two daughters) just to spoil them, so I grew up knowing I could have and be whatever I wanted. At the time, I wanted to be a red Power Ranger; but looking back, I realized how important it is to know you can ask for and receive your every intention. Growing up knowing the power I held has allowed me to achieve my biggest dreams before the age of 25, and I feel like my life has never felt more beautiful.”
Jasmine Browley, Contributing Business Editor
“One of the many ways he instilled confidence/self esteem in us is by always offering the space to reach for our dreams, just as long as we actually tried. ‘If it don’t work out, just go to the next thing. Ain’t nothing wrong with trying.’”
Rayna Reid Rayford, Contributing Editor
“My Dad always told me ‘pretty is as pretty does,’ and to me, that has always meant that beauty starts from within.”
Robyn Mowatt, Contributing Fashion Editor
“My father surprisingly was the one who taught me how to take care of my skin. From a young age, he taught me and my twin sister how to exfoliate, how to properly wash our faces and also shared how important it is to take care of our skin as it’s a first impression you leave on people you meet. I reckon with this often largely because it’s true and it also instills self-confidence. Of the many lessons he’s taught me resilience, grit and confidence are a few of the strongest.”
