Very little has changed in the two years since I wrote a piece here at ScreenCrush that pleaded with the Hollywood studios to release more family films. Prior to last weekend, when we saw Wicked: For Good, it had been months since there had been something we really wanted to watch on the big screen. In fact, the last film we went to see in the theater was the sing-along version of Netflix’s Kpop Demon Hunters. You know things are grim in multiplexes for families when you go to see something you already have access to at home (and have already seen there many, many times).
As a movie-loving dad, I’m lucky if there’s one kid-friendly film in the theater at any given time. Now, mercifully, there are two: Wicked and Zootopia 2, the sequel to Disney’s hugely popular animated movie about a bunny and a fox who team up to solve a mystery in a world populated entirely by talking animals. The original Zootopia is another title in heavy rotation around the Singer house, so my youngest daughter jumped at the chance to attend the sequel’s press screening with me. (To be fair, if I offered her the opportunity to watch an instructional video about carpet installation she’d probably jump at that chance too as long as there were popcorn and candy involved.)
A big reason why I love going to the movies with my kids is because we typically spend the entire trip home from the theater talking about whatever we see. Sometimes the conversation focuses primarily on the film, but often it ranges into other topics. After Zootopia 2, for example, my daughter and I compared the sequel to its predecessor, but we also discussed the intricacies of zero to ten ratings systems, whether we would ever eat bugs, and the meaning of the phrase “don’t judge a book by its cover.”
What follows is a lightly edited transcript of our discussion. Hopefully it’s not another three months before we get to have another chat like this about a new movie in theaters.
READ MORE: Two Brutally Honest Kids’ Review of Wicked: For Good
What was your favorite part of the movie?
[ignoring my question completely] Who was your favorite character?
Um, I think I like the fox the best.
What’s his name again?
Nick Wilde. [voiced by Jason Bateman] What about you?
The beaver. [Nibbles Maplestick, voiced by Fortune Feimster]
Why’d you like the beaver?
He’s crazy! He’s a crazy driver. And he had a lot of silly lines. Like he said “I should not have done that!” [Editor’s note: In context, this line is funny.]
Before we saw it, you told me you were going to like the snake. [Gary De’Snake, voiced by Ke Huy Quan]
I do like the snake, but not as much as the beaver. The snake was my second favorite. He had a lot of silly lines, but the beaver was a little more like me.
So you liked the two new characters more than the old characters from the first movie?
Yes.
That’s interesting. How did you think it compared overall to the first Zootopia?
I think I liked this one better.
Really? How come?
It was more funny.
It did have a lot of funny parts.
Also, it was more exciting.
It certainly had a lot of chase scenes. I don’t remember the first movie having quite so many chases.
They didn’t have any chases in the first one.
They had none?
Well, they had one or two because they were cops. But in this one they were getting chased.
Mmm. The chasers had become the chase-ees.
[Flashes a disgusted look.]
No? No good?
Just the “chase-ee” part.
You don’t like it?
“Chase-ees” is weird bro.
Oh sorry. Was there anything about this one you didn’t like?
[thinks for a few seconds] They kept, like, shooting each other.
Now that you mention it, you are right.
For a movie about talking animals, just like a kids movies, for there to be shooting and trying to kill people, it was a bit much. And snakes poisoning people, and people eating each other. [Editor’s note: I don’t recall any people eating each other?]
Yeah… I know you got a little scared at one point too. Was it too scary?
Not too scary. Just scary.
Close to too scary?
Yes.
How do you know when scary becomes too scary? What’s the difference?
I don’t know. I don’t know how to describe it. I just know.
You kind of grabbed me and hugged me at one point. That seemed like maybe the moment where it got a little too scary.
Nah, I do that at lots of movies. I like snuggling.
What did you think the message of the movie was? Was there a lesson you took away from it?
Um … that everyone belongs? What did you think?
I think you got it right, yeah, everyone belongs.
And that people shouldn’t take credit for things they didn’t do.
Yeah, definitely. Also don’t judge a book by its cover.
Huh?
Have you ever heard that expression? Don’t judge a book by its cover?
No.
So that means, like, when you pick up a book, the first thing you see is the cover, right?
Yeah.
So the cover could be beautiful, but the book inside could still be boring. Or the cover could be kind of weird-looking, but the book inside could be amazing. Right?
Yeah.
So the expression “don’t judge a book by its cover” means that just like a book, where you shouldn’t judge it by its outside, a person’s outside doesn’t equal who they are on the inside. Like, just because someone is beautiful doesn’t mean they are nice.
Like the evil queen in Snow White?
Right. So does that make sense?
Yeah.
And you see how this movie was kind of about that?
Yeah, they were judging the snakes and the reptiles.
Exactly. So Grandma, for example, doesn’t like snakes.
She’s judging them by their cover.
Yes. She should be forced to get a pet snake. Don’t you think?
No!
She needs to learn not to judge a book by its cover.
She should not have to get a snake though.
Hm, okay. What if we just make her pet a snake?
I petted a snake once.
You did? What was it like?
It was actually kind of squishy.
Where did you pet a snake?
At, um, it was on a field trip in second grade. We got to pet a snake. At the zoo—
—topia? You went to Zootopia? Wow.
I didn’t go to Zootopia.
But you said you went to a zoo…topia.
No.
Oh I’m sorry. So where did you go?
It was an animal place where you learned about animals.
Sounds like a zoo…
It wasn’t a zoo.
…Topia.
[The dirtiest look an eight year old is physically capable of giving]
Did you pet any other animals?
We got to pet a turtle.
That’s cool. That’s another reptile.
Duh. Like I didn’t know that!
Oh sorry.
Which did you enjoy more: Zootopia 2 or Wicked: For Good?
[With absolutely zero hesitation] Wicked. Obviously.
Obviously! No question?
No question!
Zero doubt?
No.
If you were given a score to Wicked: For Good out of one to ten, one being awful, ten being amazing, what would you give it?
That’s hard!
What about the same question for Zootopia 2? One is like “Ugh, I hated it!” Ten is like “I loved it!”
Does it mean like it’s the best movie ever?
Yeah, ten is like “That’s the best movie I’ve ever seen in my life!” Nine would be like “That was amazing!” Eight would be like “That was great!” Seven would be like “That was pretty good!” Six would be like “That was all right.” Five would be like “Ehhhh.” Four would be like “Yeah I don’t know about this.” Three would be like “Well, that was bad.” Two would be like [lengthy fart noise]. One would be like “Aaaaaa! It was the movie ever! Run for your life!”
Um … maybe a seven?
Seven, I think that’s a good score. That sounds about right for Zootopia 2. Not a six?
No.
Okay so not a six … a seven. As in …. “six seven”?
Argh!! Dad! Stop.
Okay, now you’ve had a minute to think about it, so what about Wicked?
I can‘t!
Why is it hard to give a grade to Wicked but not to Zootopia 2?
Because it’s so good!
So give it a good score.
I could give it a ten?
If you think it’s the best movie you’ve ever seen, you should give it a ten. It’s your opinion. You get to give it whatever score you want.
And what’s a nine again?
Nine would be like amazing.
And what’s eight?
Eight is like really great.
A nine.
You’d give it a nine? An excellent score. How about the first Wicked?
Also a nine.
Not a ten. Not the best movie you’d ever seen either. What’s a movie you would give a ten to? The greatest movie you ever saw, even better than Wicked.
[thinks for five seconds] Hamilton.
Hamilton. Great answer. What about The Wizard of Oz?
I’d probably give that an eight.
Okay. So you like Wicked more than The Wizard of Oz?
Yes, but the Wizard of Oz is super good too.
It is, absolutely.
Is there anything about Zootopia 2 you would have changed?
Yes.
What is it?
Less guns.
Less guns, okay. Fair enough.
Instead of them using a gun they could use something else.
Yeah, they could. Were there any jokes you thought were really funny? Oh I remember when you laughed a ton: The scene where they eat worms.
Ohhhh! [laughs hysterically]
Why was that so funny?
Because they made weird faces like this. [Makes a truly weird face that defies description]
Wow. Have you ever eaten a worm?
No.
Would you ever eat a worm?
No!
Would you eat any bug?
No.
Did you know some people eat bugs?
I know.
But you would never do it?
Is a lobster a bug?
That’s a good question. They do look kind of like bugs, but I think technically they are shellfish, not bugs. Supposedly bugs are very high in protein. Like a cricket.
Ugh.
You don’t want to eat a cricket?
No. Would you ever eat a cricket?
I mean, if I was really hungry. But I’d rather not.
I’d rather eat … what’s something we don’t like to eat?
I don’t like peas.
Well I like peas. I’d rather eat cauliflower.
I like cauliflower.
I hate it.
Have you ever had cauliflower?
No.
But you don’t like it.
Yeah.
You can just sense it?
Yeah.
How do you know?
Because I’m magic.
You’re a funny kid.
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