Rita Wilson and Tom Hanks have been married for 37 years, which in Hollywood is the equivalent of several lifetimes. So when Wilson talks about what makes a relationship actually work, it’s worth paying attention. Her advice isn’t flashy or performative. It’s rooted in an unglamorous, everyday moments that she believes quietly add up over time.
As Valentine’s Day approaches, that idea comes up again and again. When we asked celebrities to share the best piece of relationship advice they’ve ever gotten — something they actually use — the answers weren’t about grand gestures or rigid rules. They were about respect, kindness and the small habits that keep two people connected when life gets loud.
From Wilson and Olivia Culpo to Kelly Rowland, Traitors’ Maura Higgins and more, the advice spans decades of relationships — and just as many perspectives. Some of it is thoughtful. Some of it is very funny. All of it is refreshingly honest about what love actually looks like behind closed doors.
Rita Wilson (actress, The Last Thing He Told Me)
“It’s my own relationship advice, and I think it’s absolutely essential. I tell it to anyone getting married. You have to share a bathroom, because you have to be able to talk to each other when you’re getting ready, when you’re washing your faces, when you’re brushing your teeth. Some people are all about separate bathrooms, and I’m like, No. You have to share a bathroom.
Matthew McConaughey and Camila [Alves] said they like a queen-size bed, which I think is good too. It’s smaller and cozy.”
Rita Wilson tells Yahoo it’s essential that couples share a bathroom. (Photo illustration: Jenny Chang-Rodriguez/Yahoo News; photos: Getty Images)
Jessi Draper (reality star, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives)
“OK, so I’m a hypocrite because I did not follow this and exposed my relationship on national television, but something I’ve learned is when you have an issue with your partner, don’t tell other people unless it’s your therapist. Because then they might use it against you. They won’t forget because they’re protective of you, whereas if you move on with your partner, they still hold on to it, you know? And that’s a lesson learned.”
Duff McKagan (bassist, Guns N’ Roses) and wife, Susan Holmes McKagan
Duff: “Never go to bed angry. That’s a classic one, but so true.”
Susan: “We’re running up to 27 years of marriage, so I’d like to think we can help some newer couples. He’s my best friend, but we make time for each other. We go on date nights.”
Kevin James (actor, Solo Mio)
“If you’re going to eat late at night or in the middle of the night, and you’re downstairs in your underwear making something in the kitchen, turn the cameras off — or just be honest and say to your wife that you did do that and you left the chili pot out. Either turn the cameras off or be honest. You can go either way.”
Alyssa Milano (executive producer, Balance: A Perimenopause Journey)
“If you can laugh through whatever you’re going through, you’ll be OK. I’ve been with my husband for almost 20 years. No matter what, he makes me laugh. I wish that lightness for every relationship.”
Kelly Rowland is working on asking husband Tim Weatherspoon that one simple thing: How was your day? (Photo illustration: Jenny Chang-Rodriguez/Yahoo News; photos: Getty Images)
Kelly Rowland (actress, Relationship Goals)
“I was told that two people who coexist in a space, a relationship, have to allow each other the space to evolve and grow.
And continue to ask questions about each other. Just the simple things … how was your day? What brought you joy? What pissed you off? Like all those things are so important.
I think that sometimes in a marriage … that stuff kind of gets drowned out. But then I’m like, here’s this person that just wants to be seen by me, and I want to be seen by them. So I want to make sure that I’m feeding him what he needs. And that’s simply just wanting to know him a little bit better day by day.”
Scott Hoying (singer, Pentatonix) and husband, Mark Manio
Scott: “Date someone kind. That’s the most important thing. You can get through anything as long as y’all are sweet and respectful of each other.”
Mark: “Be their No. 1 supporter, just in all facets of life: in their career, in their personal life. In the hard times, the good times, just root for them no matter what.”
Olivia Culpo (model/media personality)
“My parents have a great relationship — five kids and still each other’s best friend. My dad always says that respect is the foundation of a relationship, and I couldn’t agree more.”
Maura Higgins has some harsh advice. (Photo illustration: Jenny Chang-Rodriguez/Yahoo News; photos: Getty Images)
Maura Higgins (reality TV star, The Traitors)
“Don’t trust men.”
Dylan Efron (reality TV star, Dancing With the Stars)
“Sacrifice. Being in a relationship, it betters your life, but you also have to sacrifice your current life. I think it’s all about meeting someone halfway. I think if you’re trying to find someone who fits your puzzle and makes your life better, it’s not going to work out.”
Miles Caton (actor, Sinners)
“Have something to offer. … Sometimes [things] can become one-sided, but I think you should be in a place before you get in a relationship to have something to offer somebody. It should be an equal balance exchange.”
Chris Olsen (internet personality)
“Don’t ever try to get into a relationship — just don’t think about it. The second I was like. ‘I’m sworn to being single, and I love it, because I love spending time with me and I don’t want anyone in my home,’ was when this British man was like, ‘What about me?’ I’m like ‘OK, you can come in.’”
