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Everyone knows everyone in Rhode Island, the tiny ocean state. Trying to tell each of the ladies apart is like a part time job, but the mess is messy and the rumors are spreading. Good thing “secrets don’t stay buried for very long” with the Real Housewives of Rhode Island. Most of these women choose a tell-it-like-it-is mentality, but when Kelsey Swanson finds out Rosie Woods has been questioning her relationship, trying to find out the truth becomes harder than she thought.
We are first introduced to Alicia Carmody and her big Italian family who live a whopping 15 minutes away from her (the nerve!). Alicia has been engaged since she was 7 months pregnant…which was about 9 years ago, but she seems like she is in zero hurry to walk down that aisle. Her fiancé is a restaurateur on Rhode Island and they seem to be living a good life together.
Alicia talks about Liz McGraw, who she has known since she was born. “Queen Elizabeth” lives in a castle with her husband and step-daughters, which is fitting considering her husband is the King of Cannabis and she is the Queen of Weed. Liz, the “scary one,” owns a cannabis dispensary with her husband, who she may be related to somewhere down the line (a statement that, much to my chagrin, was just glazed over).
Liz meets up with Kelsey so she can have a boat moment and chat. She knows Kelsey because she grew up with Kelsey’s boyfriend…there is quite an age gap between Kelsey and her boyfriend, but that’s not the biggest issue. You see, Kelsey’s boyfriend is gone for a good five months of the year, living in Miami with his other girlfriend.
Kelsey defends this man that she has been with for over ten years, considering she lives a life of luxury. He comes from a prominent family in Rhode Island and so she has been lucky enough to be a lady of leisure. With his help, Kelsey felt like she could compete as Miss Rhode Island and so she is forever thankful for him. But now, she wants more. Kelsey is longing for a committed relationship with a person and she needs to either accept what she has or leave. Is it worth giving up her lifestyle?
We meet Jo-Ellen Tiberi as she heads out to date night with her husband. She met her hubby back in high school and admits that her big sister liked him (and may have had a fling with him), but Jo-Ellen chased him and got him in the end. Awkward. Jo-Ellen admits that she comes across as a b*tch, but as a mom to three kids, she has to have a soft spot. She also loves her job in aesthetic sales, teaching companies how to use the equipment.
Alicia has clicked with Rosie over the past two years. Rosie is far more than her pink Jeep. She was a local newscaster so everyone kind of knows her. Rosie has been married for one year now and she explains that she met her husband when she was an intern on a morning show.
Since leaving the news, Rosie has started a lifestyle show and so she has decided to mix a segment with her friends. She is inviting some of the girls to a picnic and plans to invite Jo-Ellen, despite things being rocky between them. The last time Jo-Ellen and Rosie were together, Jo-Ellen was loudly talking smack about Rosie and so Rosie is a bit uncomfortable.
Jo-Ellen admits that she is not a fan of Rosie’s, but nonetheless, she attends her picnic. To help cut the tension, Rosie invites her friend, Ashley, a Virginia transplant brought to Rhode Island by her husband that she met while on Bachelor in Paradise. Ashley has been married for 6 years and has two kids, but has yet to find a group of friends since the RI ladies are hard to infiltrate.
During the picnic, Jo-Ellen talks about Kelsey and her “life changes,” hinting in a cryptic way that Kelsey is having a problem with her relationship. This opens the door for some questioning. Rosie is confused by Kelsey’s relationship since rumors are swirling. Nosey Rosie, a nickname she gave herself, just wants to figure out the situation Kelsey is in.
Jo-Ellen calls Rosie out for talking sh*t, but Rosie finds this hilarious considering Jo-Ellen had no problem talking sh*t about her. Rosie wonders why Jo-Ellen would even come to this picnic if she has such a big problem with her and Rosie gets emotional. Jo-Ellen tries to start over with Rosie and wants to move on and start fresh. The true olive branch is when Jo-Ellen invites everyone to her fourth of July party, Rosie included.
Ashley and her husband own a coffee shop and lounge called Audrey’s. It’s the second ranked celebrity owned and run place in the U.S., which is quite the feat, but a lot of that comes from her husband pouring everything into it. She wishes he would spend more time influencing and less time whipping up coffee drinks so he could be more present in their lives. Ashley fills him in on the upcoming fourth of July party and is excited to have fun with her husband.
Jo-Ellen has rented a house for her fourth of July party and is going all out, despite not knowing what the fourth of July is all about. Jo-Ellen’s mom reports for babysitting duty and Jo-Ellen reflects on how hard her mom was on her growing up. It seems like their relationship is a bit tumultuous, but grandma did show up to help out today.
On the way to the party, Jo-Ellen wonders what might go down with Rosie. Rosie is desperately trying to get Jo-Ellen to like her, but it seems like it’s gonna take more than champagne and fire crackers.
Our New Jersey queen, Dolores, makes her entrance with Liz, her buddy that she met at a cannabis convention a few years back. Dolores and Paulie are staying in Rhode Island for the summer, so she has been embraced by this group of women.
The connections between these ladies are wild. Kelsey knows Jo-Ellen because they used to work at a tanning salon together. Fun fact: At this salon, Jo-Ellen was hooking up with the owner, and then the owner and his wife.
Jo-Ellen lets Kelsey know she stuck up for her at Rosie’s picnic. According to Jo-Ellen, Rosie was questioning her relationship and Kelsey realizes right away that Rosie is not a girls’ girl. Kelsey gets upset when her relationship gets questioned and plans on talking with Rosie.
Jo-Ellen decides that as the hostess, she will greet Rosie, despite what she’s been hearing. Alicia points out that Kelsey came solo, but from day one, Kelsey’s relationship had rules that she agreed to and that’s that.
While getting a caricature done, Kelsey explains that she has yet to talk to Rosie about her smack talking. She tells Jo-Ellen that she can’t understand why Rosie can’t stop talking about her relationship.
Side note: Liz admits that she went to Dolores’s surgeon and dentist, which might explain why they look like twins…
Later, Kelsey calls Rosie over to talk about the picnic rumors. Kelsey just wants to know who was talking about her relationship. Rosie innocently states that Jo-Ellen brought up the hard time Kelsey has been going through with her boyfriend and so that got Rosie thinking. Now Kelsey is confused. She is unsure who is being honest. Kelsey understands that rumors are just part of this state, but trying to get to the truth is going to be hard to do…
WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON THE RHORI PREMIERE EPISODE?
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