It all started when her sister showed up to the engagement party in a white dress…
Weddings are a sensitive and stressful time as a bride and you want the people around you to be supportive and positive. However, one anonymous bride has decided her sister is not one of those people.
In the story posted to the infamous AITA (“Am I the A–hole”) forum on Reddit, the OP (a.k.a. the “original poster”) explained why she is not inviting her sister to her wedding after what went at the engagement party.
Here’s how it all played out.
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“I (27F) am getting married in two months to my fiancé, Alex (29M). We got engaged last year and decided to have a small engagement party with close family and friends. It was supposed to be a joyful occasion, but my sister, Emily (24F), caused quite a scene,” OP began in the forum.
“Emily has always had a flair for drama, but I didn’t expect her to make my engagement party all about herself. She showed up late, wearing a white dress (which felt inappropriate), and immediately started complaining about everything – the food, the decorations, and even the guest list,” she continued.
“The breaking point was when she got into a heated argument with my best friend, Sarah, over something trivial. She accused Sarah of trying to ‘steal the spotlight’ and ended up causing a huge scene that left many guests feeling uncomfortable,” OP claimed. “My fiancé and I had to step in to diffuse the situation, and it completely ruined the mood of the evening.”
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“After the party, I had a long conversation with Emily about her behavior. She apologized, but it felt insincere and more like she was just saying it because she had to. Since then, I’ve been anxious about her attending the wedding and potentially causing more drama,” OP explained, before sharing her final decision about it.
“After much thought, I decided not to invite Emily to the wedding. I felt it was the best decision to ensure the day went smoothly and was about celebrating our love rather than dealing with unnecessary drama,” she wrote. “When I informed Emily, she was furious and accused me of being unforgiving and petty. My parents are also upset, saying I should have given her another chance and that I’m being too harsh,” she said.
That’s when OP decided to turn to the internet. “Now, I’m starting to feel guilty. I don’t want to cause a rift in my family, but I also want my wedding day to be peaceful and happy,” she wrote.
“AITA for not inviting my sister to my wedding?”
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OP was met with a lot of support for her decision to keep her sister off her wedding list, despite her parents being upset. One Redditor believed Emily’s actions — and choice of gown — was a “rehearsal” for what she would do on the big day. “White dress? So she was rehearsing for the performance she intends to give at your wedding. I really don’t see how you have any other choice but to exclude her after that. NTA.”
As for how to treat the parents who are clearly heartbroken by the decision, one Redditor wrote a script for the bride, “‘Mom, dad, I am not interested in having a guest who whines about my choices and picks loud public fights with my friends at my wedding. She had her chance to show me she’d behave herself, and she blew it. If you want to be upset at someone, be upset at the person who actually did something wrong, because it wasn’t me. The discussion is closed.'”
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Still another is of the opinion the bride’s parents are playing favorites.
“NTA but you need to be honest with yourself. Look, not inviting your sister to your wedding is 100% one of those things that divides families. It sounds like, unfortunately, your parents might be choosing her over you. Which sucks. But ultimately you need to decide you’re not going to let them control your actions and your wedding day even if it does cause a rift in the family. They’re still TAs.”
Others don’t believe Emily will be taking the lack of invitation lightly and suggested the bride hire bouncers for the wedding.
“She might still show up. But I don’t see how you invite her now without her telling everybody publicly about how she wasn’t invited for a minute,” one Redditor replied to the original post.
“NTA but if you uninvite her make sure you have security and give them her picture. ETA tell your parents to invite her to their vow renewal wedding,” another noted.
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Despite there being an overwhelming number of “NTA” votes on the bride’s post, there were some who disagreed with the bride, insisting that her decision to not invite her sister was going too far.
“I wouldn’t say YTA, but not inviting her to your wedding does seem extreme. Perhaps you could have spoken with her about her behavior and talked about your expectations for her behavior at your wedding,” one Redditor poster before adding there may be a touch of jealousy coming out. “From the little information I was given, it sounds like she may be a little jealous that you’re getting married. I assume she’s not married?”
“Honestly? Not inviting your sister will cause far more drama than inviting her. She makes herself look ridiculous not anyone else,” another wrote.
What do you think?
