Let’s grab a front row seat so we can watch our Real Housewives of Miami take the stage at Miami Swim Week! Kiki and Julia will be walking the walk so let’s show them some support and watch them work it!
Julia is visiting swimwear designers who want her to wear their designs for the runway at Swim Week. She admits it has been 24 years since she has done this but appreciates the opportunity to show she still has it. Julia shares that she put her professional life on hold while Martina was fighting cancer but now she is ready to rock a swimsuit and get her groove back. Julia still looks amazing in the swimsuit so she has not lost it and she will be able to close the show, which is a huge compliment. It is a win-win for Julia—and her goats.
Kiki is meeting with another Fashion show designer that she will be wearing for swim week. She admits she is really in her element as a model. Kiki shares that her family was unhappy with her dream to be a swimsuit model. They saw modeling as being pornographic and tossed her out at 15 years old. Kiki had to work at Burger King (Now it makes sense that she brings Burgers in a bag from there to a party since it is comfort food) to be able to survive during this time. She has an impressive portfolio of photos which show off her beautiful body and face.
Guerdy and Russell head out to have dinner. She must have more tissue cells removed since they did not remove them all. Guerdy is refusing to do another treatment nor a mastectomy. She feels like her new reality is too scary and Russell is trying to encourage her and be positive.
Lisa and Jody are looking at a home for her to buy and you can tell she is not happy giving up her Star mansion. The house is a 5.3 million home, and she still does not know if her settlement will enable her to afford this place. Jody tries to encourage her to move towards a settlement agreement, but she thinks Lenny likes to tease her with great options and then snatch them away.
Kiki has Nicole, Adriana and Guerdy at her get together before the show. Adriana finally admits that she let Nicole take the blame and she should have been more transparent. She acknowledges that she only invited Ana to f*ck with them since Alexia was shaming Lisa. On productions cue no doubt, Alexia and Marysol arrive and greet the other ladies.
Julia looks beautiful in her coverup, and she floats down the runaway. She walks out to close the show and it is an accomplishment to have done this at 50 years old. There is now a 2-hour break until Kiki gets her time to shine.
Nicole is sitting down with Alexia and Marysol to hopefully resolve the Mamacita madness. She wants them to realize that she did not invite Ana to cause trouble—but Adriana sure did. Nicole thinks she is going to have to tell them in every language possible before it sinks in that it was not her intention to upset them. Nicole should whip out flash cards to explain the sequence of events since they have photos! I still find it bizarre that they give Adriana such a pass since it is expected for her to be an a*shole but Nicole has her feet held to the fire. Please make it make sense to me! Alexia is not willing to step down from her assertion that they were set up. She must have a neuron misfiring in her Cerebrum since that is our seat of intelligence, thinking and judgement.
Lisa and Larsa arrive while they are all bickering over this nonsense. Larsa asks Adriana what the reason for the Ana invite was. Adriana was going to have Ana share some financial dirt on Alexia. Lisa is giddy that Adriana would go to this length to support her. Nicole must leave since she has plans with Anthony that were made before swim week. Adriana believes that Nicole is the real Barbie and Alexia is jealous of her beauty and her ownership of real estate. #facts
We have arrived at Kiki’s fashion show, and I love some of these designs. Kiki looks stunning and Guerdy is proud of the Haitian sensation named Kiki. Larsa is disappointed that neither model put their skank on for the show since that is all she has going for her. The sprinter van is stuck in traffic and Marysol gets out of the van since her stomach is upset and it is five o’clock somewhere. Kiki is upset that everyone is not willing to wait till it clears for her after party. This was not nice and the only ones who stayed were Adriana and Julia.
Alexia drives out to Julia’s farm, but she decides to dress like a sexy farmer in her overalls. She is ridiculous with how fearful she is of the baby goats. Julia reflects on how Martina’s cancer changed her life view. Alexia wants to plan a girl’s trip to Mexico City during Pride. She lets us know that her faith got her through Frankie’s recovery. These two seem to get along—since Marysol is not present.
Alexia calls Larsa and Marcus who are filming their Separation Anxiety podcast to invite Larsa to Mexico City. Marcus is ok with this since he will be in Paris for Men’s Fashion Week. Larsa is already trying to count in her bloated brain how many times does she have to bang Marcus to cover their sex quota for 5 days. The topic for this week’s episode is their age gap and Larsa gets annoyed she is referred as his Auntie since she is 16 years older than him. Marcus makes a good point that if he were older than her it would be a non-issue.
Marcus asks Larsa about her thoughts on more kids. Larsa shares that while she was filming KUWTK they decided to do an egg retrieval. She has eleven little Larsa’s in storage in LA! Marcus, who I think is kidding, says he wants five kids! He needs to make sure if they do have kids Larsa leaves their original version alone and does not allow them to morph into an overinflated love doll like their mom.
Guerdy, Russell and Liam are playing cards, and she is a little loopy from her pain meds. Alexia calls to invite Guerdy to Mexico City. Guerdy had another test to see if it is recurring and she will be looking at getting chemo. She must wait and see if she can make the trip since she has alot on her plate. Side Note: Andy has Erika and Nicole on his show tonight and my mouth just dropped when I saw Erika’s outfit. She really needs to get a better mirror and stop dressing like an aging hooker. Nicole looks lovely pregnant, and I could not be happier for her.
W-T-F is Adriana wearing to the sound studio with her jeans stapled to her back. Do they not fit her anymore and she is trying to create a fashion trend? She really is lucky to have Emilio Estefan as her mentor and producer since he is Miami royalty in the music industry working with Shakira, JLo and Ricky Martin. Adriana is going to record a song that was originally written for Camila Cabello. Emilio tells her that she could perform while she is in Mexico City. We jump to one week later in Mexico City and Adriana is performing her music for the international crowd. Be well Blurbers and see you next week for the FINAL episode of RHOSLC!
TELL US — THOUGHTS ON THE LATEST RHOM EPISODE?
